I loved you you left me

no amount of alcohol nor cigarettes will make me feel better. No rebounds will make me forget you, it still haunts me how you can be as mean as you were to me. One day you act like you love me the next day you left me broken into a million pieces. A month, that’s how long we lasted but it still break me. I am so lost right now not knowing what i want. I want a replacement for you, someone who can love me as if you loved me before. The sweet little morning message you sent me. I want you back but i know that will only hurt me more. You’re probably out there sleeping with other girls knowing what a fuckboy you are. It hurts me knowing how worthless i am to you. Tu m’as fait mal Flo, tu m’as cassé. Je t’ai aimé et tu m’avais laissée comme une merde. I only ask you for a last rendezvous. Why did i had to fall for you. Why did i let you sneak into my heart knowing you will hurt me? Je suis bête, je le sais. J’ai dit que t’es un connard et t’en faut pas le coup, mais t’es toujours dans mon cœur. Je sais que t’es avec une fille en train de niquer. Je suis même pas dans ton pensé. I had to force myself to cry to make me feel better, i am lost, i am broken. I need help. I need you, i miss everything. I miss you. I miss your lips against mine, i miss sleeping next to you, i miss your crazy stories, i even miss the things that i hate about you. I miss watching you drive, and scratching the back of your neck. I miss your sweet texts, i miss your body against mine, i miss feeling like I’m in love with you, i miss  your hand holding tight mine, i miss having to tiptoe to kiss you, i miss feeling like you love me. I miss you calling me « ma chérie », i miss looking forward to meet you, i miss everything. I miss missing you knowing that you’re  mine, not like now. Where i can miss you mais tu t’en fou de moi. T’es toujours dans ma pensée. Comme tu m’as fait tellement mal au coeur. Je comprends pas, tu doit être un bon acteur, tu m’avais fait croire que tu m’aimes et  que t’es vraiment bien avec moi mais non. Tu t’en fou de moi. Je suis qu’une fille que t’avais laissé comme une merde. Pourquoi tu doit être un connard que tu es. Where’s the sweet Florian that i loved? I know, a month is nothing but it was everything for me. How i fall hard for you and you left me in the gutter just like that. I don’t even know what i want right now. I want you back but I don’t want to have to face the day that you left me once again because i know you will, i want to find someone but all i find is people who want to fuck me. I don’t want any one night stands, i want you Florian. I hate myself that i let myself fall for you. I have to move on from you, i don’t want you in my mind anymore. Please leave my mind just like you left my life. I need to get better i can’t stand being all broken-hearted like this, feeling hallow and hurt at the same time. Some days i was fine, some days I’m not. I want to be all days are fine. I want to stop wanting you back.